My thoughts at the moment are largely dominated by the interview I have tomorrow morning for my teacher course, so forgive me if this is short. Whether or not I get into teaching next year depends on what these people think of me and how I'm able to put myself across
Yes, Sarah, interview blah blah, what has this got to do with being an insecure writer?
Well obnoxious version of me, it's simple. Because your writing is judged in kind of a similar way.
I love writing. I just don't think I'm very good at it. Pure and simple.
I'd love to teach. I just don't think I'd be very good at it. Hang on...
See the similarities there? I don't know whether or not I'd be a good teacher, and I am unqualified to therefore say whether or not I will be a good teacher. That's why I'm going to this interview. Experts in the field who are able to make an assessment from a 5 minute presentation and some questions whether or not I show promise and can be moulded by a year of study and training into a teacher.
The same, in theory, should go for my writing. I don't think I'm very good. Some people have told me that I am, but their either 1) friends/family members 2) fanfiction readers who are likely to say anything nice as long as your spelling and grammar is decent and your characters have at least a speck of personality. But here's the thing. I'm also unqualified to make that judgement call. That's why we have agents and publisher people. Experts in the field who can tell you whether or not your book can be moulded into the best version of itself. I'm not very knowledgeable about the MS to book arc, but from what I hear, there's a LOT of tweaking, twisting, moulding and polishing goes on before a story ever sees the light of day.
And I can say all these things until I'm blue in the face. It does not make them any easier to do. I'm terrified by my interview tomorrow, in case they say no. I'm absolutely terrified of ever sending any of my writing off to someone in the writing profession, in case they say no.
But you can never know if you don't try.
Sarah x
Of course you're qualified to say whether you're a good writer. If you read your work and you love it, then you are a good writer. If others read your work and they love it or even like it, then you're a good writer. Never leave that judgement up to agents and publishers. They are in it for the sells first, quality of your writing is second.
ReplyDeleteThere is not one piece of writing that everyone likes. Luckily the world is big enough, that if you are a good writer, you should be able to find that right niche of people who will love your writing. That's my hope even though my book is in a genre that's not proven salable enough to agents and publishers - Christian speculative. Which was why I self-published and am learning as much about marketing as I can. Another luck is that I'm enjoying the process immensely.
Anyway, judge for yourself whether you're a good writer and go at it with both hands blazing. Okay, your writing hand.
I'm terrified of book readings. Every time I have one, I spend the previous 2 days throwing up. I understand your fear, Sarah. It's paralyzing. So, what to do about it? Let the fear and anticipation fuel your passion for teaching. Let them see you're nervous because you're serious. You want to teach, you love teaching, and you believe you have something to give. I've been on the other end of the process and I'm here to tell you that when I see passion, I'm inspired. I'd usually end up hiring them, too.
ReplyDeleteHappy IWSG.
I hope you did well on the interview!
ReplyDeleteSometimes it's difficult to know how well we'll do something until we do it and can measure our quality.
My husband also loves to write and doesn't think he's very good at it. But I've read his stuff and he is good!! Sometimes your own insecurities can block your point of view. Don't let it. :0)
ReplyDeleteGood luck on your interview!
Hugs!
Valerie Nunez and the Flying Platypi